Joz, from Where It Feels, by Kaitlin Schuster

JOZ. (genderqueer/trans masculine) Do you think I want that, Hana??! Do you think–Don’t you think that I feel that every day? I AM SOMETHING DIFFERENT. And I’m not acting this way because I don’t care, if I didn’t care, we wouldn’t be having this conversation, I wouldn’t be MAD, I wouldn’t be hurt and it’d be like, “Yeah, whatever, think what you want, MOTHERFUCKERS!” Obviously, I want what every fucking person on this planet wants and it’s really unfortunate that I’ve been born into this body that I don’t get, that doesn’t get me and what people see isn’t what I am and, yeah, every person might feel that, I know I’m not unique in feeling that THIS, all of THIS, it’s not me and so, yeah, I want them to know, I want to be able to not having a tiny heart attack every time I’m out in public and I have to go to the bathroom and which one do I choose? Because either way, if I walk in and some lady’s washing her hands and I see her face, she could be the nicest woman on the planet but it’s all over her face, the fear, “what is this BOY doing in my space?” and the men think I’m some little bitch and it’s like, there’s no space for me, no one has carved out a space for me, I mean, I can’t even walk into a public place where people go to take off their pants.

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